“So how much do you weigh now?” That was the question I was asked recently. “What does it matter” was the response I wanted to give! The truth is I do not weigh myself.

 Weight is the measurement on which your motivation depends if you possess that terrible instrument of torture – the weighing scales! Used daily it does more damage to the psyche than any other instrument. If it does not deliver the expected weight loss you want, the effects are devastating…

~       Emotional turmoil;

~       A feeling of failure;

~       A reinforcement of the belief you are ‘Not Good Enough’;

~       Increased unhappiness and stress;

~       A reversal of healthy eating for comfort eating;

How crazy is that? Isn’t it time to start…

ü      Measuring life by happiness and not weight;

ü      Measuring size by inches not pounds;

ü      Measuring health by energy and fitness;

ü      Eating for love of self and not for comfort;

Have you ever noticed the toxic effect that some foods have on your body? Years ago, before I began my ‘Conscious Eating’, I never realised that some foods had a positive effect on my body whilst others signalled they really didn’t suit me by…

~       Making my muscles stiff and soar;

~       Causing my joints to ache;

~       Making me feel bloated;

~       Making me feel tired;

~       Making me feel low or depressed.

The more consciously I began to eat, the more in tune my mind was with my body. Gradually I began to discover the foods that really motivated never cell of my body.  

FOODS THAT MOTIVATE

z     Fill you with vitality and energy;

I have just had a lovely weekend with old friends at one of the Proms in the Park. The food that we all took to share, yet again was supplied in an over abundance, as was the wine!

The evening was wonderful and this year I enjoyed myself even more because…

There was no more guilt!

Have you ever wondered what it is that keeps you trapped, unable to remotivate yourself when you had eaten something ‘bad’?

It is the pattern of guilt . . .

L        The thoughts that you ‘shouldn’t have eaten . . .’

L        The shame of eating too much;

L        The thought of how much weight you have put on;

L        The thought of how ‘bad’, weak willed and useless you are.

With these thoughts you keep yourself trapped in a pattern of behaviour that brings only stress and the inevitable comfort eating. Its no wonder life is a struggle and permanent weight loss so elusive when your life is dominated by shame and guilt!

So here’s how you stop the guilt . . .

J        Reflect on how much you enjoyed the food;

J        Tell yourself you are allowed to enjoy it;

J        Remember, one meal of excess won’t be noticed on your hips;

J        Remember your motivation comes from positive thoughts;

J        Reflect on how much you enjoy the food that gives you energy and happiness (your special fuel mix);

J        Reflect that without guilt there is no need to comfort eat;

J        Feel the motivation to eat the foods that lift your spirits.

I was only reflecting this morning on the importance of friendships to our level of motivation. For too many years I surrounded myself with friends who did nothing to aid my motivation, self-love or happiness. In fact, if I am honest the friendships I was used to were destructive and demotivating.

Eventually I realised that my permanent weight loss came when I was truly happy and self-loving enough to seek out friendships that fed my soul. These are the ones with people who…

·           Bring a ray of sunshine in your life just when you need it;

·           Are joyful for you when you have good news;

·           Are supportive and non-judgemental;

·           Will tell you the truth;

·           Tell you how wonderful, unique and beautiful you are;

·           Love you and all your ‘wobbly bits’;

·           Accept you just as you are – the good and the bad;

·           Support your dreams and aspirations;

·           Encourage your self-loving actions;

·           Love the person you are now and the one you were born to be.

And the most important friendship of all turned out to be with myself!

The funny thing is, once I began to fill the roles of friendship listed above, by myself, true and wonderful new friends began to come into my life. And the remarkable thing is, as my friendships grew with the people who feed my soul, so my unhealthy relationship with food diminished.

I was watching one of those makeover programmes the other day and it struck me how much self-belief the two presenters had compared to the ladies having a makeover. Well, it wasn’t so much the surprise that the two ladies had very little self-belief in their beauty and wonderful bodies but that the presenters were so genuinely surprised at this realisation.

It is not hard to understand when so many of us had little or no positive affirmations, in childhood, that we were gorgeous and beautiful. In fact our whole lives have revolved around the absorption of messages that we are ‘Not Good Enough’, so much so that self-belief can be completely smothered.

The great thing is that we can turn this around and see our motivation for permanent weight loss sour, though the development of our own self-belief. All it takes are a few key steps…

·           Stop believing that you’re ‘Not Good Enough’. The fact is you generate and hold on to your own negative beliefs, so the great news is you can also turn them around!

·           Accept ‘What is’ i.e., “I am overweight” and add a codicil “And I am gradually discovering the weight I was born to be” The more you fight ‘What is’ the more your stress rises and your comfort eating increases.

·           Start identifying your negative beliefs and replace them with positive ones i.e., “I am fat and ugly” can be replaced with “ I am a wonderful and lovable person.” You don’t have to fully believe it at first. Just keep telling yourself the positive.

·           Start noticing the positive messages that come your way that tell you how good other people think you are. Start believing them!

 The more you work on your self-belief, through loving thoughts and actions, the more your motivation rises. By taking the focus off food and onto self- love, the remarkable happens – you stop the struggle with food and fear and begin a love affair with yourself and life.